The New Sports Drink Flavor.

This morning Kyler had a fairly well-rounded breakfast. After starting
with last night's dinner rolls (nuked in the microwave and served with
a side of honey), he dug into a delightful fruit cup, some Teddy
Grahams and a few slices of cucumber. Yes, cucumber. He'll eat it these
days, and Daddy's trying to eat healthy, so we're all riding on the
same bus.

Well, as I was cleaning up after him, I noticed he had gotten a
head-start on me, and managed to stuff a few grahams and bits of
cucumber and a few chunks of fruit into the water bottle I had placed
beside him. I gave him a water bottle because when I originally brought
him his feast, he predictably said, "Daddy, I want apple juice!" as he
always does. Not having a juice box on hand and spying the nearby
bottle from last night, I improvised and gave him Nature's Liquid Gold
instead. (No, that's not a brand name, I'm using a euphemism for water.
Of course, euphemisms are usually to denote something unpleasant, so I
fell short in that area, too, I'm afraid... Man, I'm just on fire today...)

At any rate, seeing the petri experiment in a bottle, I made a mental
note of how disgusting it looked and reminded myself to toss the bottle
away instead of washing like I'd normally do. Unfortunately, an
iron-clad memory isn't one of my strong suits.

A few minutes ago my doctor friend Rob (who lives in the same
neighborhood) worked on my back and neck, trying to iron out a kink I
developed from sleeping the wrong way. Well, if you've ever been to a
masseuse or physical therapist, they always tell you to chase down your
punishments with a healthy dose of water. Needless to say, when Rob
walked out the door, I reached down and grabbed one of the ubiquitous
bottles of water we have lying around the house.

Which also happened to be Kyler's Bottle of Blecch.

The deep swig barely settled upon my tongue when I realized, to my
horror and disgust, that I was drinking crummy cucumber mango phlegm. A
few moments of spitting, coughing and gagging later, I had the inspiration to record this moment for all to share on my nifty Blog of Profound Thoughts.

Let the reader beware: look closely at your bottle of water before you
take that swig. There could be more in store for you than you think...

Kevin

Movie Review: Cellular

The Hook: An everyday woman gets kidnapped from her home, reason unknown. She manages to get a smashed phone to work and randomly calls some kid on his cell phone. Said kid runs around L.A. trying to prevent bad things happening to her kid, husband, etc. Bottom line hook: it all takes place over a matter of hours.

The Score: B-

The Conclusion: Pretty good cinematography, with the appropriate zooms, angles, etc. Standard action-thriller stuff. The kid (whatever his name was) was an impressive actor. Kim Bassinger kind of seemed to be... ah... phoning it in... (no pun intended). She just seemed to be overly whiny and crying all the time... maybe that's her character, when people get kidnapped... I dunno...

Mixed feelings, overall, but it wasn't a bad movie. Certainly worth the whopping fifty cents I spent on it... decent writing, with just about any cell phone problem you can conceive of getting stuffed into the script. Not bad, though...

Mr. Poopy Pants.

So I'm in the process of training Kyler to potty train these days, and it's just a barrel of fun. While he doesn't have some of the toilet fears I've heard of other kids conjuring up (i.e. fear they'll lose a limb by pooping), he's still not gung ho about pooping in the right place. He did it at 18 months, twice, and it was a joyous day (yes, I'm expressing joy over my son's poop. Now I just KNOW I'm getting older... ugh...). After the double-play, however, we got nothin'. No repeats, nothin'.

To be honest, I'm clueless on the process, aside from being careful not to shame him when he pinches one out in his underwear or waters the lawn (and his leg). I know there will be accidents, that's a given, but I just want to figure out how to get him to anticipate his Butt Gut and let it out in the right place, ala, The Toilet. It'll take some time... maybe I should read a book on the subject or something..

In other news, I'm slowing beginning to sell stuff on eBay again, and it feels good. I haven't sold anything since we moved out of St. Louis back in May, so I've been sitting on boxes and boxes of books, CDs and knick-knacks. I'm kind of missing a typical "rhythm" to my life here in Edmond so far, but I think I'll try to reign it in a bit, schedule my life some more, and get to work. (Selling, Writing, Promoting PaperPolisher.com, etc...)

That's all, Folks.

Kevin

Aquarium Apartments.

I saw this in the latest issue of Wired, and though it looked pretty
cool.